Valentine’s Day is here! I’m sharing some hints on loving your husband. The list is endless, so I’ve narrowed it down to fourteen. Feel free to pop over to Part 1 for the first seven helpful hints.
Let’s face it. Guys sometimes don’t think like we do. My sweet husband was concerned about weight I had gained several years back – and rightly so! It was more than I had ever weighed in my life. However, when he was talking with me about it, he used the “O” word – obesity. Now, before you get your feathers in a ruffle, he DID NOT say I was obese. He was just concerned that I was headed in that direction. But, bless his heart, you just don’t use that word when you are talking to a woman about her weight. I don’t think I spoke to him for two days. TWO DAYS. Two days out of our lives that are wasted, because I didn’t have the sense and maturity to forgive him. Ladies, please don’t ever waste precious time away from your husband like I did. Forgive him. “…love keeps no record of wrongs.” 1 Corinthians 13:5
9. Your home, his castle
Make your home a safe haven for you hubby. Make it a peaceful place for him. John travels quite a bit. When he’s gone, I don’t cook, do laundry or dishes. But when he walks through the door, I try to make sure all the mess is picked up (not tonight, I’m writing tonight). Ok, I’m not as good at this as I use to be. I’ve relaxed a lot in my old age. But I do try to be his helpmate. I know he’ll be tired when he comes home, so if necessary I take care of chores that he usually does. Yes, like take the trash out and put a fresh 5 gallon water bottle on the cooler (Heavy!). Make your home a peaceful, loving place. He’ll look forward to arriving at his castle each evening!
10. Be Kind
Titus 2:4-5 says that older women are to encourage the younger women to love their husbands and children, and to be kind (among other things). I thought it odd that the younger women had to be taught how to be kind. After all, kindness begins at home, doesn’t it? Sometimes you would never know this by the way I act. I can be kinder to a stranger in Wal-mart than I can to my husband, when I’m in “a mood.” Let’s be kind to our husbands, “so that the word of God may not be dishonored.” (Titus 2:5).
11. Practice Patience. Count to ten. Then, count to ten again. And again, and again.
12. Don’t Husband Bash
Ever been in a conversation with some girlfriends that went something like this:
“You wouldn’t believe what a slob my husband is. I wish he would learn to pick up his stuff!”
“You think yours is a slob, mine is such an idiot! He can’t even make the simplest repairs around the house!”
And on it goes, getting worse and worse. This is dangerous and destructive behavior. It is contagious and spreads like a virus! RUN FROM IT! Husband bashing is extremely damaging to your marriage. The more you dwell on your perceived wrongs in your husband, the more unhappy you will become.
Don’t participate in these conversations. Try to steer them back to positive aspects of your spouses. If you can’t, I say again: RUN FROM IT!
Be especially careful in front of the children or grandchildren. They need to see your respect for your man, not your scorn for him.
13. Say Thank You. Always. For every little thing. Let him know you appreciate him.
14. Laugh Laughing together is good medicine for any marriage. And it relieves stress.
Remember, there are many, many ways you can love on and encourage your sweet hubby each day. Be alert to hints he may unknowingly give. You won’t be sorry!
(This post first appeared February 2015)
Grace be with you,
I think the older you get, the more you realize that the time you have together is precious… I still have plenty of room for improvement in numerous areas that you’ve mentioned. Thanks for tackling the difficult topic of us focusing on our hubbies, especially when we like to be on the receiving end on this holiday. Lol
Glad to see you back, Debbie! Love you, sweet friend!
Great tips, sweet Ellen! XO
Awe, thanks Liz, love you!!
Such good advice that we often forget in our overwhelmed moments of life:) Sometimes I come home from work frazzled and frustrated, and I forget that my husband should get the BEST of me. (Instead, I sometimes show him my worst.) Thank you for this gentle nudge, friend!