“You’re such a beautiful person – inside and out!”
I looked behind me to see who my friend was talking to – no one was there! She was talking to me…ME? While I so appreciated her compliment, my first thought was, “She hasn’t been inside my head!”
But my friend knows me – warts and all! And she still think I’m beautiful. Go figure!
Truth is, I’m just a mess. Time and time again, “messy” rears it’s ugly head.
- Like when that sandpaper person aggravates the stew out of me. My thoughts are… MESSY!
- Then there’s grocery shopping on Monday night, after a long, difficult day at work. This certainly brings out the “messy” in me! Really, MUST you keep your cart in the middle of the aisle, causing a traffic jam??? Some of us have better things to do on a Monday night than lollygag through the store! Not so beautiful…
- How about the other night, when I missed the trash can, and wet coffee grounds splattered all over my clean kitchen floor? The writer side of me wanted to take a picture for this blog. My perfectionist side wanted it cleaned up quickly, and wasn’t having nearly as much fun as my writer side…Messy, inside and out!
I’d rather people not see my mess. I’d rather them see “pretty” – pretty attitude, pretty spirit. But that isn’t always the “real” me. I have a temper that flares way too often – with the ones I love most. I have snarkey thoughts about…well, things.
Why, at my mature age, can’t I be the Proverbs 31 or Titus 2 woman? The woman that oozes strength, kindness, reverence and grace? I WANT to be that woman. I pray and read scripture, then act like I’ve never heard of the Bible. I get grumpy and cranky and let everyone know it. I’m not perfect. I fall, and then I get up again.
But I do get up again, with God’s help. He began a good work in me, and He will perfect it in the day of Christ Jesus (Phil. 1:6). I am thankful for this sanctification – this act of becoming holy and set apart for God.
So what does all this mean for messy, imperfect me?
Jesus is the One who sanctifies me. I can’t do it on my own. Hebrews 2:11 says “For both He who sanctifies (Jesus) and those who are sanctified are all from one Father; for which reason He is not ashamed to call them brethren.” (NASB)
It’s a choice. Hebrews 12:14 says I must pursue sanctification. I choose to pursue it. I choose obedience. I choose to emulate Christ. However, my first choice has to be accepting God’s gift of salvation through His Son, Jesus.
It’s a process. I won’t turn into the Proverbs 31 woman overnight. Little by little, being obedient to God’s Word, following the example of Christ (John 13:15), and with the power of His Holy Spirit (Ephesians 3:16), I will become sanctified in Him.
Sadly, there are times I also choose “messy”. On those days, I know Christ’s love, mercy and forgiveness cover me. He sees me and knows me, warts and all. He knows the messy side of me. And still thinks I am beautiful inside and out. Go figure.
Proverbs 4:18 But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, that shines brighter and brighter until the full day.
Kathryn Shirey says
I can SO relate to this! Grateful for grace so I can begin again and again! Wonderful post!
Ellen says
Thank you! Thank you for your comment and for stopping by!
Doris S. Swift says
I LOVED this post Ellen!! You are so funny, and I could relate to so much of what you said. My sink looks like that right now! Yes, had the coffee grains thing happen too. I couldn’t share this post fast enough. God’s timing is so perfect 🙂 Love your warts, but nothing a little Compound W Jesus can’t fix! Thank you!
Ellen says
Thank you Doris! You are pretty funny yourself! Love the Compound W Jesus! How true! Thanks for stopping by!
betsydecruz says
Yes, I can relate to reading scripture, praying, and then ACTING as though you’d never read the Bible. Just ask my family! I’m guessing you’re more of a Proverb 31 woman than you think…. 🙂
Ellen says
Ha! Thank you Betsy!
Teresa says
Thanks for being real. Because, I find myself in the middle of a mess all too often. Wasn’t it Paul who said I do what I don’t want to do and don’t do what I should do, or something like that! 🙂
Ellen says
Yes! Romans 7:15 I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do
Thanks for stopping by! Thankfully we have a God who loves us in spite of our messy selves!
Ava Sophie says
I can absolutely relate to this. Being a girl with a fast temper, I also wants to be the proverb 31 woman- preferably right away(!), but He molds me in his hands just the way He intended. It is like that friend of yours telling you that you are beautiful–sometimes we don’t see the beauty within us, but more the messy parts. I am SO glad you shared from the scripture! It is spot on, need-to-know reminders that I need to tell myself every day! Because I will speak the truth. And the Truth IS Christ. Thank you for sharing and especially for revealing the true you:0) Blessings!
-Ava Sophie
Ellen says
Ava Sophia, thank you! And thanks so much for your kind comments abad for stopping by!
Julie Lefebure says
Great post. Great words, Ellen. There are days, I too, act like I’ve never read the Bible. Those days are messy–and ugly. I’m thankful for God’s grace and sanctification. He never gives up on us. Thank you for your transparency. I can relate!
Ellen says
Yes, Julie, I am so very thankful He doesn’t give up on me! And He will finish what He started!!
Sabra Penley says
Ha-ha! Did you take pictures in MY house? Oh yes–messy is definitely a part of my life, too! It is wonderful to be reminded that I’m not perfect now and I won’t be perfect until the Lord comes again or calls me home. But I find peace and comfort in knowing that God loves me–mess and all. And He isn’t done with me yet. He is constantly helping me clean up my messes so I can grow in Him and serve Him each day. Thanks, Ellen! Blessings to you!
Ellen says
You nailed it! He is helping us clean up our messes so that we can learn and grow in Him! Thanks for stopping by, Sabra!
elizabethfstewart says
I’m happily right next to you at Jennifer’s this week! I like your beautiful, honest, transparency!
Ellen Chauvin says
Hi neighbor! Thanks for stopping by! Yes ma’am, transparency is needed! The church and it’s members are not perfect, which beautifully reflects God’s grace in our lives! Without Him….
Love your blog, and really enjoyed your story! Our childhood churches can hold so many precious memories, amen?