Ellen Chauvin | Soaked & Sprouting

Soaked in God's Word, Sprouting Seeds of Faith

The Gift of Notice

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{My guest today is my dear friend Carmen Horne, author of Out of Words: 31 Prayers of Hope for Your Hurting Heart. Carmen and I met years ago, in an online writer’s group. We have shared our writing journeys and encouraged each other along the way. What I love about Carmen is her compassion and her desire to minister to women, by guiding them to see life through a new lens. Sometimes a small change in perspective is all you need to see things in a different and better way.  A way filled with hope!}

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There is a scene in my favorite movie, Hope Floats, where we find Travis and Justin Mattise sitting on the porch after the funeral of Travis’ grandmother. Travis’ mom abandoned him early, and he just buried his beloved grandma. He is pondering where he will fit in this new normal with his Aunt Birdee and cousin Bernice. 

As Travis holds a telegram from his mom, pain and uncertainty are written all over his face. Bernice has Aunt Birdee. Who will he have? Alone and feeling invisible, Travis asks Justin, “Aren’t you going inside to say hi?” and Justin answers, “Don’t you know? I came over to say hi to you.”

One of the greatest gifts we can give someone is the gift of notice. 

The gift of notice is costly. It requires us to look beyond ourselves and recognize the contribution of others or the pain they endure. Jesus was a giver of notice:

But Jesus said, “Someone did touch Me, for I was aware that power had gone out of Me.” When the woman saw that she had not escaped notice, she came trembling and fell down before Him, and declared in the presence of all the people the reason why she had touched Him, and how she had been immediately healed. Luke 8:46-47 NASB

The crowd dismissed her. She was one person in a sea of people. We know her as the woman with an issue of blood. Jesus knew her as a daughter. He recognized her touch even when He didn’t see her face. She did not go unnoticed by Jesus. We don’t either.

[tweetthis]We don’t go unnoticed by Jesus.[/tweetthis]

For God knew his people in advance, and he chose them to become like his Son, so that his Son would be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And having chosen them, he called them to come to him. And having called them, he gave them right standing with himself. And having given them right standing, he gave them his glory. Romans 8: 29-20 NLT

“Our circumstances can make us feel deserted. When we are facing uncertain times, we long to feel God’s presence. We may feel alone and invisible, but we are never truly alone — Jehovah Shammah — God is there.” Out of Words, page 49 and 83.

Knowing in our head that God is always near is one thing, but recognizing His presence in the midst of our turmoil is harder. I think we miss it because most often, His comfort and provision come in the form of those He places in our path. 

How can we give the gift of notice to those around us?

  • Pay attention. This is a hard one. Most of us will only accomplish this with prayer and intentionality. Life is busy, and we have our issues too. But, that never stopped Jesus. On His way to the most important three days of His life, He helped those that were in His path. A prayer for our day should include, Help me notice those in need around me, Lord.
  • Say thank you. The housekeeper in the restroom, the checker at WalMart, the waiter that fills our glass, and our husband that plugs in our phone to charge. 
  • Meet needs. We have all heard the saying that we might be the answer to someone’s prayer. I can guarantee we are. 

Never walk away from someone who deserves help; your hand is God’s hand for that person. Don’t tell your neighbor “Maybe some other time” or “Try me tomorrow” when the money’s right there in your pocket. Proverbs 3: 27-28 MSG

God knew us in advance and will orchestrate circumstances to meet our needs. He notices, and He asks us to give the gift of notice to those around us. 

 

Carmen Horne is an author, Board Certified Advanced Christian Life Coach, and speaker who uses her gifts to encourage women. She is passionate about supporting women through life’s challenges as they learn to change their perspective on the unexpected. Her new book is Out of Words: 31 Prayers of Hope for Your Hurting Heart. 

At the ripe old age of 16, the Bayou State native married her high-school sweetheart. They have one beautiful daughter. Carmen is a dark chocolate nibbler and beach sitter. But her favorite activities are those she participates in as a wife and mom. 

When There are No Words

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I wish I’d had this book in 1993. Or 2003. Especially in 2011. These are the years that carried heartache and heartbreak for me. Loss that was almost too much to bear. 

Try as I might, I struggled to process all that was happening. And pray? Well, no. I had no words. Only rivers of tears and oceans of grief. 

So, yeah. I wish my friend Carmen’s book would have been in my hands all those years ago. In 1993 my husband walked out on our eleven year marriage. In 2003, my Daddy passed away. And in July of 2011, my Mom lost her battle with the stroke that had paralyzed her two months prior.

 Oddly, the grief over my Mama’s loss almost undid me. A girl needs her Mama. Oddly, I was strongest in the Lord, and deepest in His word in 2011. I would have thought I could process her death better, celebrate her life and home going with great joy, and stand on the promise of eternity that I know to be true. But no. The waves of grief washed over me, sucking me under, threatening to drown me in my sorrow. 

I tried to pray. I couldn’t. What could I say? I just wanted my Mama back. I wasn’t ready to not have her anymore. I didn’t want to wait until I got to heaven to see her again. Processing my feelings and emotions – well, I just couldn’t.

Yep, I needed this book back then. And today. Maybe you do too?

The lump in my throat began to form when I was reading the introduction. It continued to grow, the more I read. One reader described Carmen’s writing as tender. Yes, Tender, with a capital T. So much so, that you almost can’t take it. You know, like when you’re really hurting, and someone is nice to you, and it makes you wail. I told several people after my mom’s death “Please don’t be nice to me, I’ll start crying.” That’s how tender this book is.

“I’m convinced the prayers God understands most clearly are the tears streaming down our cheeks. Our tears speak volumes, my friend. They are so precious to Him that He collects every one.” Out of Words – 31 Prayers of Hope for Your Hurting Heart, introduction.

 

In her book, Out of Words – 31 Prayers of Hope for Your Hurting Heart, Carmen Horne offers so much more than thirty-one prayers. Each prayer includes the following:

  • Scripture based devotion
  • Prayer invitation 
  • Space to journal and process your pain
  • “When your words return” section that includes a question and gratitude prompt
  • Scripture affirmation
  • Hope-filled declaration

Carmen doesn’t leave you to walk blindly through your pain. She guides you through it, helping you process what’s in your heart. Rooted in Scripture and drawing from her own experiences with a shattered heart, Carmen offers Holy Spirit inspired insight to help you rediscover the words you need – words to ask God to care for and heal your broken heart.

Carmen assures us that God can handle our sadness, even when we can’t!

“Most of us don’t do emotions well. If we can’t fix it, we want to walk away from it. Oh, that we could learn the art of a quiet presence.  There is someone who can always handle our sadness. God does not flinch at the sight of our tears. He continues to reach out to us when we try to hide. He not only brings peace, He is Peace — Jehovah Shalom.” Out of Words – 31 Prayers of Hope for Your Hurting Heart, devotion #2

If you are hurting, or shattered or broken in any way (aren’t we all?), you will want to buy this book. 

And now, I must give you this disclaimer: Carmen is a dear, dear friend of mine. HOWEVER, I am not recommending her book because of that. I’m telling you to buy it, because Carmen has walked beside me through thick and thin. She’s offered prayers on my behalf; she’s shared her experiences of brokenness to guide me; and she’s loved and encouraged me. She does the same for the readers of this book! Buy an extra copy, and give it to someone who is out of words.

Find out more at outofwordsbook.com

Grace be with you,